


it's about trust

by civillove



Series: seblaine prompts from tumblr [119]
Category: Glee
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-27
Updated: 2021-02-27
Packaged: 2021-03-18 20:42:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,837
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29739615
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/civillove/pseuds/civillove
Summary: anon prompted: seblaine break up and sebastian realizes he’s fucked up--Sebastian knows he fucked up.He’s not usually one to cater to his mistakes or anything, not because he doesn’t make them—but because he doesn’t care. Shit happens, life goes on.Except in this case, his whole world stops.
Relationships: Blaine Anderson/Sebastian Smythe
Series: seblaine prompts from tumblr [119]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/82780
Comments: 12
Kudos: 68





	it's about trust

**Author's Note:**

> it’s rough out here and i’m tryin’ my best. thanks for the prompts and support <3

Sebastian knows he fucked up.

He’s not usually one to cater to his mistakes or anything, not because he doesn’t make them—but because he doesn’t care. Shit happens, life goes on.

Except in this case, his whole world stops.

When Blaine breaks up with him, he goes through so many emotions that he can’t distinguish one from the other anymore. He’s repeated so many of them, said their names in his head over and over until they’ve lost all meaning.

He’s angry and then justified, depressed and then numb, amused and then livid—all over again, round and round he goes in a carousel of his own feelings. Sebastian sifts through these different stages in which he talks to himself. How he never deserved Blaine in the first place, how he should have known this wasn’t going to work out for a variety of reasons—mostly because he’d fuck it up at some point (which he had). But then switches gears in the conversation where he _knows_ that he and Blaine are meant to be together, that they can fix this, that he feels utterly pathetic without him.

There’s this tug of war where one side says _you’re better without him_ , while the other murmurs _that’s not true_.

He understands that there are moments where relationships don’t work, no one being together is perfect all the time. But Sebastian knows that he loves Blaine, more than anyone else—sometimes more than _himself._ Which is why three days after breaking up, he squashes down the urge to drown himself in self-pity and move on with whatever half-decent looking guy he can find at a bar.

Teenage Sebastian was more than used to running away but he’s grown up, become a different person—that’s why Blaine gave him a chance in the first place.

He realizes that when he starts hitting on guys with anything close to hazel eyes, dark curled hair, and a decent ass that he only needs to be one place.

Sebastian hasn’t been able to get this one image out of his mind since he slammed their apartment door shut and started staying at a friend’s.

And it’s not…it’s not Blaine’s tear-streaked face from their fight that had ended things. Sebastian thought it might be, but it isn’t. Despite how beautiful he is, he hates seeing Blaine cry, hates even more to be the cause of it. He figured that image would burn itself into the back of his eyes and it’d be the only thing he could think about.

But instead, it’s this image of Blaine just waking up in the morning. Of coming out of their bedroom, still half-asleep, and finding him in the living room. Of spreading himself out across Sebastian who’s on the couch drinking coffee. Blaine’s skin is warm, voice rough streaked with sleep when he says ‘morning’ and settles against his chest.

Sebastian can’t stop thinking about that heated weight, the scent of Blaine’s hair and skin, the way he’d feel soft kisses planted against his shoulder and neck as he sat there watching a morning sitcom.

And he comes to an ending thought that…he wants that _everyday_ for the rest of his life.

He can’t have that if they’re broken up and he _refuses_ to let any other man take his place—not that Blaine would move on that quickly, or anything.

Sebastian stands outside of Blaine’s apartment, _their_ apartment, for a few moments before he knocks, staring at the ugly red wood. He doesn’t like to admit he has any short comings (mostly because he doesn’t think he has many) but he’s distantly aware that he should have kept his mouth shut that night.

_Sebastian feels that tell-tale anger bubbling like a shaken soda can inside of him, unable to back down from an argument when it presents itself to him, “He’s into you. He’s practically frothing at the mouth when you’re around.”_

_“You’re being ridiculous,” Blaine throws back, crossing his arms along his chest—protecting himself, “It doesn’t matter if Matt has feelings for me. He’s just a friend!”_

_“Oh,” Sebastian scoffs, “So you admit he has feelings for you.”_

_Blaine glares at him, “That’s not fair.”_

_“Do I look stupid to you?”_

_The shorter’s jaw works, “You really want me to answer that right now? Matt’s…sweet and he’s a good friend, he’s been there for me. But he’s not_ you.” _Blaine shakes his head, staring into Sebastian’s eyes, “Don’t you believe me?”_

_And Sebastian does. He_ does— _of course he does. But he’s so fucking mad and stubborn that it prevents him from speaking, his teeth clamping down on his tongue. It’s a mistake he can’t back-peddle from because it’s too late._

_And then, what’s worse, is that Blaine loses the fire in his eyes—looking extremely tired instead, “I don’t want to do this. I’ve already been with someone who never listened to me so, we don’t have anything else to talk about.”_

_Somehow being compared to Kurt makes the argument even worse, he’s even_ more _livid than he was before because it’s such a low blow delivered entirely too cold. “Fuck you.” Sebastian snaps heatedly and grabs his coat, leaving the apartment with the door slamming shut behind him._

And now he’s standing there staring at the same door.

They hadn’t exactly said the words _I’m breaking up with you_ but Sebastian’s pretty sure that’s what he’s dealing with after three days of radio silence.

He lets out a long sigh and pinches the bridge of his nose before lifting his hand and knocking. He swears if someone other than Blaine answers the door, like Kurt or fucking Matt, he’s not going to be responsible for his actions. Luckily, a head of curls greets him, a smile slipping from his lips as he realizes it’s Sebastian.

The taller raises his eyebrows because, “Not happy to see me?”

Blaine clicks his tongue off the roof of his mouth, “I thought you were my take-out.” He doesn’t move back from the door, which is a bad sign. “What do you want?”

“Can I come in?”

“No,” Blaine says quickly and damn if this version of Blaine isn’t a _little_ bit of a turn on. Sebastian’s always enjoyed getting Blaine riled up, to have him feisty and quick to put his foot down, to stick up for himself.

Definitely enjoyable…but not to be on the receiving end of it. Sebastian sighs softly, tilting his head a little because _please?_

Blaine rolls his eyes, his resolve crumbling as he eventually opens the door and lets Sebastian through. The taller glances around the apartment and is glad to see that nothing has changed. His shit isn’t in boxes, waiting for him to take them—the smallest light at the end of a very long, dark tunnel.

“Look, I really fucked up.” Sebastian says, turning to face his…well, he _hopes_ not his ex-boyfriend.

Blaine watches him for a moment before raising his eyebrows, “You’re going to need to be more specific.”

Sebastian bites his tongue; _this little shit,_ and yet at the same time the statement feels valid. He hasn’t exactly been the best version of himself the past few weeks before the fight even happened. There was a reason it exploded as it had because he let everything bottle up. Something he rarely does, Sebastian so used to speaking his mind but…

At the end of the day? He’s always been worried about losing Blaine, literally since the moment he got him. So he hadn’t said anything. Hadn’t spoken about his worries in a calm manner before they had a chance to become a powder keg.

“I’m just sorry for all of it.” He says lamely and that’s _not_ the right choice.

Blaine scoffs out a frustrated noise, “Right well, saying sorry makes it all better, doesn’t it? Let me get the door for you.” He turns to reach for the front door and Sebastian scrambles, reaching forward to grab hold of his elbow.

“Jesus, wait, okay? I’m not the best at this.”

“At apologies?” Blaine asks, “Yeah, I know. Don’t you think that’s part of the problem?”

“It is most definitely part of the fucking problem,” Sebastian agrees quickly, his hands going on his hips, “Because I’m not sorry about a lot of things most of the time. But I don’t mean to hurt you or make you cry. Never.”

Blaine swallows, looking away from him as the words register, like he’s too afraid they’ll pull him back in. It’s within that moment that one of his walls drop and he’s no longer interested in kicking Sebastian out but he’s open to listening.

And maybe that’s one of Blaine’s biggest faults, giving people second and third chances, letting Sebastian royally fuck up and then explain himself. He hated being compared to Kurt, to be linked to that amount of toxicity in Blaine’s last relationship. Sebastian realizes he has to do better, that _Blaine_ deserves better.

He’s put up with so much in the past that there’s really no other alternative.

“I don’t like how Matt looks at you.” He says and that instantly makes Blaine prickle but he _has_ to say it—he should have said before all of this.

“Sebastian,” Blaine says tiredly, running a hand through his curls.

“No, I know. There’s nothing going on,” He swallows, “And it’s not about…believing you or not because I trust you.” Sebastian says quickly, his eyes finding Blaine’s, “I trust you more than anyone.”

“I would never cheat on you.” Blaine says quietly, almost can’t keep his gaze, an old wound that Sebastian doesn’t quite understand raw and open in front of him.

Sebastian shakes his head, “No, I…I never thought that you would. Those insecurities were mine and I should have talked to you about them, instead of letting it get out of control.”

Blaine looks down at his shoes and there’s a few quiet moments that pass between them before he shrugs his one shoulder, “You tried…I wasn’t listening.” He then looks up at the taller, taking a step towards him, “Where uh…where have you been staying?”

“In my car,” He quips, and then, “Friend’s couch. Are you asking if I’ll come back because I’d fucking love to. There’s so many lumps on that couch, my back resembles a ninety-year-old man.”

A soft laugh slips out of Blaine’s lips, “Sexy,” He teases before he nods a little, “I guess that would explain why you look so disheveled…I mean really, you look a _mess_ —”

Sebastian closes the distance between them, wrapping his arms around Blaine’s waist. Another series of laughs leaves Blaine’s mouth as he squirms, trying (but not very hard) to push Sebastian away,

“I’ll let you stay if you shower.”

Sebastian grins down at him, “Deal, but only if you join me.”

Blaine smiles, pressing himself up on his toes to kiss him—words unspoken in the gesture.

And yes, Sebastian loves him too.

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading and any kudos or comments you might leave :)


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